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Walks ยท one sitting, about 14 min

Who objects?

Eight plain sentences about the calm, curious you under your parts, two at a time, and you watch who reacts. Listen to the part that objects without trying to change its mind, then rest in the sentence that sat easiest. Self-energy practice for calm time.

15 steps, drawn from 14 books on IFS.

A draft: every passage it quotes is in its book, but its own wording has not yet been checked against them.

Read every step first
  1. Sentences, and who reacts. You will hear some plain sentences about the you under your parts, the one that can be calm and curious. Say each one inside and watch what happens next. If a part rolls its eyes, that is not a problem to fix. It is the one worth listening to.
  2. Arrive. Eyes closed, or open and resting on something plain, like the floor a few feet ahead. Notice each breath as it comes and goes. Skip the pacing if it does not help.
  3. The middle of your chest. Let your attention drop to the middle of your chest. Is it warm there, or tight? Soft, or guarded? Leave it as it is. Just know how it is before the sentences start.
  4. Calm and curiosity. Say it inside, slowly: under the noise, there is still some calm in me. A breath. Then: I can wonder about what goes on in me instead of judging it. Watch for anything that answers back.
  5. Clarity and compassion. Next: I can see this situation for what it is. A breath. Then: I can be kind to the parts of me that are struggling. Notice a flinch, or an eye-roll. If the breathing does not help today, skip it.
  6. Courage and confidence. Next: I can say so when I get something wrong. A breath. Then: I am worth something on a bad day as much as on a good one. Notice what stirs. If the breathing does not help today, skip it.
  7. Connection and creativity. Last two: every part of me can reach me, even the ones I avoid. A breath. Then: there is a way through this I have not thought of yet. Notice what answers. If the breathing does not help today, skip it.
  8. Who answered back? Some sentences slide by. Others get a reaction: a tightening, an argument, a sudden urge to check your phone. Did any part push back?
  9. Find the one that objected. Which sentence was it? Turn toward whatever answered it. Where do you notice it, in your body or around it? It might be a voice, a feeling or a picture.
  10. How do you feel toward it? Notice how you feel toward the part that objected. Not how it feels: how you feel toward it. Answer with what is true rather than what sounds right, because this answer decides what comes next.
  11. What is its concern? Ask it what bothers it about that sentence. You are not here to talk it round. Listen, and let it stay exactly as unconvinced as it is.
  12. What is it guarding against? Ask it what it is afraid would happen if that sentence were true of you. Wait for its answer rather than supplying one.
  13. Where did its answer point? Sometimes a protector's fear is about now: the argument, the deadline, being let down again. Sometimes it points further back, at someone younger in you who got hurt and still carries it. Both are worth knowing. Only one of them is for today.
  14. The one that sat easiest. Go back to the sentence that sat easiest today. Say it once more, slowly, and notice where in your body it lands. Stay a few breaths, or just rest your attention on that spot. If the breathing does not help today, skip it.
  15. Before you go. Thank the part that objected, if that is true, and any that made room. Let it know you heard it, and that you may come back to it, only if you mean to. Then breathe your way back into this room. If your eyes were shut, let them open.
  16. Get to know the one that keeps stepping in. That is all right. Today, this is the part to get to know. Ask it what it is afraid would happen if it let you get closer to the first one. Then wait for its answer instead of thinking one up.
  17. Seen, and not today. If a younger part showed itself, let it know you noticed it, and that you will not forget about it. You are not going to it today. If you want, jot a note so you can find your way back later. That may be plenty for one sitting.
  18. Ask the other part for some room. Turn toward the part that has strong feelings about this one. Ask if it would give you a little room, just for a few minutes. It can stay nearby. If it worries the first part will take over, let it know you will not let that happen.